Monday, January 21, 2008

Me to We



"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow."

- Melody Beattie

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."
- Martin Luther King Jr.

"Overcoming poverty is not a gesture of charity. It is an act of justice. It is the protection of a fundamental human right, the right to dignity and a decent life."
- Nelson Mandela

"I've lost myself for good within your promise."
- To The Ends of the Earth, Hillsong

"Be the change you wish to see in the world."
- Gandhi

"Nothing in the world has ever been accomplished without passion."
- Anonymous

-----

Some of my favorite quotes. The first one is a new favorite. It's as if a light has turned on inside. Real thankfulness brings real peace. I've been reading 'Me to We' for the past few months now. It's been more than a breath of fresh air for me. It's truly refreshed me. Ever since I started teaching at an inner city school this year my heart has been enlarged by the immense love and joy of the children in my class. What I once feared, as a sheltered suburban young Asian woman, has now been erased as I find myself falling more and more in love with children in places that are so different from my realities and my 'world'.

Learning from the Kielburger brothers and their genuine compassion and love for the children of this world is humbling. I feel like I'm standing on the edge of my future - not knowing where I'll be when I graduate. Not knowing where I'll teach, who I'll teach and even if I'll teach. North America? Asia? But like I said, in this past year I've been exposed to passionate teachers, one particular professor and individuals who have sparked a huge desire in me to reach out to those who need to know they are not forgotten. To love children who don't have much and then to find out that I am the one in lack. A lack of gratitude and thankfulness.

Religion that is pure to God is one that takes care of the widows, orphans, people in distress. It is to keep oneself from being polluted from the world. To keep oneself from all things shiny and bright, attractive and alluring. How hard a task that is when I look at it from my human eyes and perspective.

But how awesome it also is when I can experience firsthand the incredible sense of satisfaction, pure joy and of course gratefulness that comes when I learn to live in service to others.

What the future holds for me is uncertain, but what I do know is that I have developed a lot more than a soft spot for the marginalized in our society, especially the children. So whether I end up on this part of the world or on another part - as long as I can hang out in the 'gutters' of the streets - I'll be just fine.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Your Eyes

God's response to my last post and my recent heart struggles...

---

She who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."

Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence.

He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,

nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.

You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-

then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;

they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

"Because she loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue her;
I will protect her, for she acknowledges my name.

She will call upon me, and I will answer her;
I will be with her in trouble,
I will deliver her and honor her.

With long life will I satisfy her
and show her my salvation."

Psalm 91 (NIV)

Let me see forever
With eyes You've opened
Standing in Your beautiful light
Hold me near
Hold me near to You
And let me see the world through Your eyes

Hide me in Your love again
Let me hear the songs of Your heart
-
World Through Your Eyes - Reuben Morgan

Monday, October 22, 2007

Frustrated...

I'm so frustrated with myself. Have you ever felt so bad because not only have you let yourself down but you've also let God down?

That's how I feel right now. Totally uncomfortable...and totally frustrated at my own weakness.

Mike and I were downtown tonight studying at U of T. As we were driving back up town like any other night, my eyes and my heart were suddenly opened for what it seemed like the very first time.

As we were coming around the usual turns in the street, I saw a young girl standing at the corner of the street by herself as if she was waiting for someone to come pick her up and in exchange for money; her sexuality.

As we drove by, our eyes met and all of a sudden I felt so incredibly uncomfortable. It was almost as if her eyes spoke out her fear.. During this time, Mike was telling me a story but to be honest, I couldn't even listen because my heart was pounding so loudly. As we made another turn, there was another girl standing by herself, ready to sell herself for whatever reason she needed to.

At this point - my mind was racing. "We should stop." I thought, "These girls need to know that Jesus loves them and that He died to save them from this." Then I thought, what happens next? I played different scenarios over and over again as we kept driving away towards home. In my mind, I thought, what if we pulled over, told them that Jesus loves them, prayed for them, took them home, cared for them, help them stand up on their own feet again. What if God had called us to save them from their circumstance?

Then I began to think, "What would my Mom think when she wakes up and in our house are two strangers?". "What if these girls bring danger to myself or Mike in the car?" Heart pounding, mind racing - couldn't quite bring myself to say anything even though I knew I needed to.

It wasn't until we were already well on the high way that Mike could sense something was wrong. I told him how I felt in fear and trembling because I've never quite felt this way before. He told me, "God is doing something right now. What is He saying to you?" Frustrated, I replied, "I don't know...!" But really, I did know. I was wrestling with God. He was telling me to go back, turn around and to do something about this - something so disturbingly wrong is such a huge reality in many people's lives around the world. I only saw a tiny, tiny glimpse of it tonight..

Once again I said, "Ugh....I don't know. After seeing Kirk not hesitate to welcome a hitch hiker into his car in the middle of the night in our weekend in Canmore - my eyes have been open to the truth that there should be no fear in welcoming people like that into our 'car's. Ugh...what do I do?"

Mike then replied calmly, "I can't make that decision for you. You just tell me, and I'll turn this car around. But it has to be your choice."

We drove. And drove. I hesitated and hesitated. Finally, we were on my driveway - me feeling defeated by my own flesh, I began to cry.

"I'm so frustrated with myself!!! Why can't I just obey?" I'm always telling people that delayed obedience is still disobedience..why can't I practice what I preach?! Mike began to remind me of what it meant to have a discontent with our world...and that the closer we get to our Father's heart the more uncomfortable our lives become. What sin has done to us and our world is completely unsettling. How can anyone be at peace?

But just as this ARGH feeling rises, hope rises too. Mike reminded me that hope is not lost and perhaps this is the beginning of something for me. He told me that he's never seen me react to this situation like this before and he prayed that I would enter my house feeling all the more uncomfortable...

We prayed for the two girls I saw...and we prayed that we would not forget what breaks our Dad's heart..

I know there are second chances with my Father, I know that His mercies are new every morning, I know there is forgiveness...

I still can't help but feel frustrated with myself...but just as Shelly reminded me a week ago - I need to remember His peace is for today. His daily bread is enough for today. I just need to be faithful and move on for today. Tomorrow will have it's opportunities, it's challenges, it's peace and of course, my Jesus will be enough for me tomorrow as He was today and yesterday. So I pray for my boldness tomorrow and I pray that when I wake up the feeling of uncomfortableness would only increase until I do something about it...

Father, help me to love you deeply because to love you is to obey.

Friday, October 12, 2007

His Love

His love endures forever.
Ps. 106:1

How simple yet how profound. This verse has been hitting home so hard so strong in the past few days. A lot of times, we find that we can experience God's love through things, people, encounters...but isn't it so great when we simply experience God's love through Himself...His Word?

Oh...how I love it...!

Not that being a channel of His love or even receiving it through other people is bad....but it's just so nice, that there are moments in this journey when we can truly experience that truth...that His love endures forever just as it is. Just through Christ Himself.

There are many times in my life, when this verse doesn't have the same impact as it does on me in these past few days or in certain moments in my life. Not that the verse itself is not factual nor deeply true - it's simply because I may not always remember or feel or know with all my heart it's depth and it's reality.

So in these moments as rare or as often as they come, I embrace it with all of my heart and being... simply because I know that His love for me endures forever.

:)

Carrie sent me this video of a skit done to the song Everything by Lifehouse. It's powerful and it couldn't reign more true to the fact that His love for us is so deep and so wide.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

As cliche as it is...

...to call this post a 'Thanksgiving' one on Thanksgiving weekend - that is what this entry will be about.

It's always interesting to see in life how things change, transform and move on. Through life, there are people who walk in and out of it leaving deep, significant marks or simply grazing through leaving little memory.

Most of the times, it takes reflective holidays like Thanksgiving to remind you of those meaningful and sometimes, not so meaningful marks in your life.

I'm incredibly grateful and thankful to say that many people who have left imprints in my life are to some extent still a big part of my life today. Of course, there are a few who have been there for a short period of time in my life and have left - in peace - because they were only meant to be there for a season. And even those friendships, I am still very thankful for.

This past week was definitely a roller coaster - full of ups and at times a lot more downs. But through it all I found friends who pleasantly surprised me with their warmth and deep love for me, even to the point of sharing in my journey whether it be the hurt or the joy. I'm thankful that even in the midst of busy-ness, they stopped to make sure I was more than okay. We can get so wrapped up in our own lives that we forget all the good we can offer one another. I'm just so glad that a few of them wrapped their lives around me this week.

As a result of all that...I am once more confounded by the great love of Christ, how His unfailing love truly overtakes my heart. Fears are stilled and my heart is at peace. I am amazed at how good He is to us...as our loving Father, showering gifts upon His kids. It's beautiful. And in the thanksgiving spirit I turn all the blessings He's showered on me back to praise of His goodness. Give thanks to the Lord for HE IS GOOD, His love endures forever...

Monday, October 08, 2007

A Return

It's about time I make a return back to the world of blogging.

This will be updated in due time - maybe tomorrow, maybe about being in the mountains... :)




Stay tuned...

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Speak UP

Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.

- Martin Luther King Jr.

Do something about this...The World in Action

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Celebratory Days

Happy Canada Day! (to where I was born and raised)
Happy 10 year Anniversary Handover Day! (to my motherland and roots)

I'm a tad bit late for both of these celebratory days, but here is an interesting article I read from TIME magazine (off Niki's blog) about Hong Kong's past ten years after her return to China.

-------------------------

These days, 10 is practically the new teen—as knowing, and as confused, an age. You think you understand who you are, but you don't, not really. You want to be independent, but you still need adult supervision. You are developing a sense of righteousness, but find it runs up against a pragmatic world where compromise is a necessity. Ten is a neat number, but a messy stage in life.
So it is with Hong Kong. At just past midnight on July 1, 1997, in a glittering and poignant ceremony, Hong Kong passed from being the last jewel of an old empire to a component of a new global power. Hong Kong people viewed their city's handover from the U.K. to China with mixed feelings: joy at a fresh start; sadness at seeing the British go; pride over returning to the motherland; apprehension over the future. Today, by most measures, Hong Kong is in great shape, but its outward appearance masks a collective angst. As the territory marks its first decade as a Special Administrative Region (SAR) of the People's Republic of China, it faces an interlocking set of existential questions from which all its once and future challenges flow: Who am I? What do I want to be? Can I be all that I want to be? Will I be allowed to?

For better, and for worse, Hong Kong's future is tied to China's. The one is among the world's freest societies, wildly entrepreneurial and fiercely independent in spirit. The other is a state that, to its enormous credit, has opened up a long-closed nation to an unprecedented degree, and lifted more people out of poverty in a shorter time than our planet has ever witnessed—but which is still authoritarian in its governance, somewhat lawless, and woefully corrupt. Though hugely different in scale, the two learn from, depend on, influence and to an extent intimidate each other. Each needs the other to prosper, yet each also sees the other as potentially harmful. Beijing has fretted about its SAR infecting the mainland with annoying ideas like democracy. Those in Hong Kong worry about China restricting their freedoms, and being a crucible for pollution and disease that can spread to their city. The subtext of this complex relationship is another host of vexing questions. Is Hong Kong a model for China, or a threat? Is Hong Kong changing China, or China changing Hong Kong? Should Hong Kong become more Chinese or more international? "Hong Kongers have no problem being culturally Chinese, but because of their history, many of them still see themselves as Hong Kong Chinese first, differentiated from mainland Chinese," says Zhang Longxi, chair professor of comparative literature and translation at City University of Hong Kong. "That is Hong Kong's strength, and weakness."

Hong Kong matters not only because it is a vital driveshaft of the global economy, transmitting the raw power of China's manufacturing capability into a worldwide system for distributing consumer goods. The city matters because it is a unique experiment that will probably succeed but could possibly fail: the creation of a free, international city within China. In the short period since a collection of fishing villages were turned into a modern metropolis, Hong Kong has survived war, waves of refugees, pestilence, drought, assorted mischief by local leftists and economic near-implosions, consistently defying the doomsayers, repeatedly rebounding. In the past 10 years alone, Hong Kong has lived through a crippling regional financial crisis, bird flu, SARS, an inept albeit well-meaning leader who was forced to leave office, the resignation of several other top officials over sundry scandals, and, in 2003, the march of half a million people galvanized by their opposition to a new security bill called Article 23—an event some feared would finally provoke Beijing into asserting its authority over Hong Kong once and for all. The city's run of luck has often seemed near the end; TIME's sister magazine FORTUNE once infamously, and incorrectly, predicted that its return to China would bring about its death.

Yet Hong Kong is more alive than ever. On the eve of the handover, the stock market index, a key barometer of Hong Kong's health, stood at the then record of 15,200; today it hovers near the 21,000 mark. Property prices—in many ways the best measure of the territory's success because they are followed so closely by the man (and woman) on the Kowloon minibus—dipped after the handover and again after SARS, but are now once again rising to stratospheric levels. "Things did not come to a grinding halt in 1997," says Sir David Akers-Jones, 80, a former acting governor who stayed on in Hong Kong after retiring. "Things continued. That was the extraordinary thing. Life went on."

But not, of course, in the way it had. Neither China nor its SAR has stood still in the past 10 years. Once, Hong Kong's preeminent preoccupation was the pursuit of wealth, and the place remains obsessed with money. (Only in Hong Kong would the website for an investment seminar be www.icanrich.hk.) As it becomes ever richer, however, Hong Kong has realized that there's more to life than making a fortune. A civil-society movement has come into being, agitating about everything from the filthy air (though it is probably the cleanest of all China's cities) to preserving old buildings to helping the poor. But this change, welcome and often inspiring though it is, does not help Hong Kong settle its true challenge: how to define its relationship with China, one that is pregnant with conflicting emotions—admiration and resentment, loyalty and mistrust, love and fear. "The return of Hong Kong to China is just half achieved," says Yan Xuetong, director of the Institute of International Studies at Tsinghua University in Beijing and a self-professed Chinese nationalist. "Hong Kong is still regarded as a special place of China, still regarded as a foreign country. Hong Kong has returned in name, but not in substance."

Hong Kong, it should be said, has always been a Chinese city. Even during the 156 years during which—through a combination of British protection, Hong Kong ambition and Chinese nonintervention—the territory grew into one of the world's foremost commercial and financial centers, its non-Chinese population, now about 7% out of total of some 7 million, was never more than a tiny minority. Unlike other colonies, Hong Kong never fell for the idea that its mother country was a damp set of islands in the North Atlantic whose people played cricket—it always had a perfectly good mother country of its own.

Yet Hong Kong, China, doesn't roll off the tongue. Hong Kong is simply Hong Kong—it is singular, as modern China's patriarch Deng Xiaoping recognized when he struck a deal with the British in 1984 establishing the principle of "one country, two systems." Quite apart from that special dispensation, wise policymakers in Beijing have long recognized that sentiment toward China in Hong Kong is fragmented. Many of Hong Kong's families, it must be remembered, are headed by those who fled communism and conflict on the mainland for the freedoms and safety of the British colony. Today's pride in belonging to China, accentuated by the mainland's rise as a world power, is tempered with wariness. (The 1989 Tiananmen killings still haunt Hong Kong as a recurring nightmare of the old new China; every June 4, those who died are commemorated in a moving candlelight vigil in Hong Kong's Victoria Park.) There's plenty of emotional baggage to go around, and plenty of uncertainty because of it. "Hong Kong's in a transition period," says David Zweig, director of the Center on China's Transnational Relations at Hong Kong University of Science and Technology. "It's experimenting with political change. Its business community is trying to seek out its future. Its demographics are in flux. It's even asking what languages it should be speaking."

Trying to resolve when to use English, Mandarin and Cantonese (all three are important and useful) is difficult enough. But the most sensitive, divisive and intractable issue in the relationship between Hong Kong and Beijing involves democracy. Especially since 2003, the year of SARS and Article 23, a democratic movement has emerged in Hong Kong, reflecting the belief that a well-educated and well-heeled city deserves representative and responsive government. Currently, the 60-member legislature is a convoluted mix of directly and indirectly elected seats. The Chief Executive, the title of Hong Kong's leader, is selected by an 800-member electoral college heavily influenced by big business, which religiously believes that greater democracy will reduce its considerable clout (it will), usher in populists and a welfare state (it won't—Hong Kong people are too pragmatic), and anger China, where Hong Kong tycoons do their deals (it might).

The standoff between conservatives, who want the status quo, and democrats, who want a Chief Executive chosen by the people and a fully elected legislature, has paralyzed politics, which, in turn, has paralyzed everything from ways to diversify the economy to tackling pollution. Both sides are deadlocked over blueprints, numbers and deadlines, and seemingly unwilling to engage in the only way out: compromise. The Chief Executive, Donald Tsang, told TIME in March that "I will resolve the question of universal suffrage totally, completely, within my next term," which ends in 2012. But as a former civil servant under the British who was knighted for his services, he still needs to prove his loyalty to Beijing—and you don't do that by pushing democracy. "We are [geographically] so close to China that we can't but help influence the mainland," says Regina Ip, a former Secretary of Security who now heads a think tank. "That's why the leaders in Beijing are very cautious." Indeed, when Tsang visited Beijing in April, Chinese President Hu Jintao told him, among other things, that democracy should be advanced "in a gradual and orderly manner."

Hong Kong must also think about its economic future. Being a part of a booming China almost guarantees that it will stay prosperous. But the mainland is a competitor as well as a partner. China's new ports siphon trade away from the SAR, and its lower labor costs siphon away jobs, previously in manufacturing, now in services. As China continues to relax investment rules and become more business friendly, more and more companies may opt to operate directly in the mainland rather than out of Hong Kong.

So Hong Kong needs to have an economic Plan B. Chief Executive Tsang benchmarks Hong Kong against New York and London and says he wants Hong Kong to be at least Asia's top financial center. David O'Rear, an American who is chief economist of the Hong Kong General Chamber of Commerce, believes that's perfectly doable: "Financial services is about as high value-added as you can get, and we're the financial center for half the world between San Francisco and Frankfurt." But Hong Kong faces stiff competition from Tokyo and Singapore, both of which, besides being cleaner and greener than Hong Kong, are also culturally richer—all extra incentives for the expatriates you need to boost your financial profile. And while Singapore is becoming a biotech center, pumping money into R&D and wooing academics and academic institutions, Hong Kong is still dependent on its traditional sources of wealth, like real estate and, yes, financial services. "We have not been able to innovate," says Ip. "On matters like developing a global research economy and R&D, we've stalled."

As far as fresh ideas go, the SAR seems stuck at a crossroads. Even as civil society takes root, democracy hits a wall. Even as the economy chugs along, the gap between rich and poor widens. Even as awareness of the environment grows, air quality worsens. Even as Hong Kong people become better educated, their English deteriorates. Even as Hong Kong wants to cash in on the China boom, it is trying to maintain a distinct character. And Hong Kong's angst is compounded by China's own. The mainland itself faces a crisis of identity and values: to be capitalist or communist, Chinese or Western, material or spiritual. With its own motherland confused, how can Hong Kong not be?

Confusion should not be mistaken for despair, however. True, China's leaders didn't really know what they were getting back in 1997. That's why they pressured the outgoing British to keep things as they were (top-down rule, cozy nexus between government and big business, no politics); they wanted to inherit a known quantity. China didn't want any surprises, and some believe that's still Beijing's attitude. "Since 1997, China wants one thing from Hong Kong: no trouble," says Tsinghua University's Yan. "Don't cause financial problems, don't cause political problems, don't cause social problems; don't cause trouble."

Yet that assessment is so pre-handover. China's leaders today are worldlier than ever. They know, if only from the experience of their own nation, that no place stands still, that if it does, that's when financial and political and social pressures build; that's when you're really in trouble. China and Hong Kong are both moving on; it's just not clear whether they will run parallel, merge or collide.

Hong Kong is a pulsating organism made up of the most enterprising conglomeration of humanity the world has ever known. That will never change. Identity crisis or no, Hong Kong understands that it's damned lucky to have become a part of China at so fortuitous a time, when the mainland is becoming ever freer and more open and in a position to give its hybrid, somewhat alien, child more opportunity than it could possibly have dreamed of. "I can't see what reason people in Hong Kong have to be pessimistic," says economist O'Rear. "We're part of China, but we're not subject to China's rules. What could be better than that?" What indeed, when you are 10 and have the world before you?

--with reporting by Austin Ramzy and Peter Ritter/Hong Kong

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Bienvenue Montreal

A weekend of fun in the sun...



...grrreat eats...



...and sharing life with dear friends... (=



Just what we needed ;)



<3

Friday, June 01, 2007

Change

It's been quite some time since I've touched this blog and I find no better reason than now to start it up again.

Lately, friends and I have been chatting about change.

Change in our attitude, change in our lives, change in our world.

This past year through much introspection and reflection, I've relearned a lot of what it means to follow Christ; to bear the name, 'Christian'.

The more I read about Jesus in the Gospels the more I realized how much more I need to cultivate His character and personality into my life. More love, more compassion, more forgiveness.

I believe my philosophy in living life has been transforming this past year. I'm nearly graduated (finishing up my fifth year) and university has played a huge part in this transformation. Life lessons were definitely experienced and taught in the hall ways of York University. The re-occurring lesson God's been teaching me is simple. It's to love.

The more I want to see change in the world the more He points me back to love. The more I want to make a difference in lives around me the more poignant the point of love becomes. I have found the greatest conversations with believers and non-believers alike is when we saturate our chats with sincerity, open-mindedness and love.

First we love, second we speak. It's the only way I seem to pay attention, perhaps it's the greatest way people understand. I want to be known for my love actions rather than my witty convincing speech.

Right now, on Facebook there is a new group that has popped up. In essence, CBC (the television station) is calling it the Wish List. It is for students to voice out their wishes/opinions about what they would want to see happen/change in Canada. The largest group's wish will be discussed on CBC as the Canadian student's greatest wish. One of the largest groups in the running right now is 'Spiritual Revival in Canada'.

I think it's great to get our opinions and thoughts across because our society definitely needs to hear more of what we think. But I also hope that I could also contribute two cents of what I think of this particular wish.

My hope and my dream is to see revival in Canada - I have always longed and prayed for it. But perhaps this is not the best way to communicate the wish across.

I always believe in loving people to Christ. Showing first (action), telling second (speaking). As I'm sure everyone knows, there can be expected animosity to Christians especially when we put ourselves out there for what we are against.

Very often, the world perceives Christians as strong headed, self-righteous and judgemental. The exact opposite of what and who Christ represents.

Can we be known instead for our love?
For our actions?
For bringing forth justice?
Loving the poor?
Caring for the needy/sick/imprisoned?
Defending the underdog?

How shall revival come across? It's when we first learn to receive and show love, then secondly, learn to speak.

It will be interesting if this wish becomes the most talked about - but we need to consider what good we are doing by putting messages out there that are not exactly music to the everyone else.

In no ways am I telling anyone to join or not to join this group. I just wanted to share the other side of the coin.

We want to bless and we want to love and in doing so, our nation will experience revival.

My prayer is that we are known more for what we are FOR than what we are AGAINST.

May Christ love continue to compel us to bless and pour out our own lives for others.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

<3

God is sooo good... :)

Happy Two Year Anniversary hun!

These past two days I've been swept off my feet....thank you for everything!

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Providence

This morning as I conducted the Grade 3 spelling test, I said something that would become reality later on in the day.

"The next word is 'scared'. I will use it in a sentence, 'I was scared of the thunder and lightening'."

The children laughed because it was beautiful, warm and sunny outside.

Later that day...

As some teachers, student teachers and I wrapped up a meeting about year book after school the weather outside looked daunting. It was getting dark, quite windy and a cluster of heavy clouds was forming at around 4:30. I called my mom and she came to pick me up.

As I got into the car the wind had picked up so much - every strand of hair on my head was standing up straight! It was like the science center without the static! I tossed all my marking and books in the back seat and got in. It was definitely a struggle to close the door!

I don't remember it ever being this windy in Toronto - maybe Hong Kong on a typhoon day, but never here.

We get home (which is only like a 5 minute drive), pull into our drive way and the gusts of winds go up another few notch's. Mom says, 'Let's wait in the garage for this wind to pass then we'll go in.' But I told her it would probably be better if we just went in now.

So I ran to open the door, my mom ran in after me after shutting the garage door. We get into our house and within seconds we see a torrent of rain come at us furiously and the power goes off.

Wow.

It's funny how my meeting finished at that specific time, how my mom picked me up and drove home in that specific time frame, how we shut the garage before the power went out and was safe inside, warm and dry before the rain that came literally seconds later...

Talk about God's providence!

If you want to see more of what happened in other parts of Toronto - check out Mike's blog and take a look at what happened in his usually calm and quiet neighbourhood.

Monday, April 23, 2007

First Week as Ms.Luk

My first week of teaching is already full of exciting, funny and silly stories!

I absolutely LOVE it!

Even though it was physically draining, the students, my mentor teacher, other student teachers and the rest of the staff at JVPS have made it truly incredible!

I've learned a few things from my week already:

1. Planned lessons are BOUND to change
2. Be flexible (I had to teach gym on the fly, push back a language lesson, play bingo instead of reviewing mutiplication among other things!)
3. Marking and assessing the kids is hard
4. Being the last to leave school isn't so bad, but I won't make it a habit I promise :)
5. Prayer moves mountains...especially when my prof came in for an observation visit!
6. Sleep EARLY

As I enter into my second week out of the four - I hope I can continue to do my best to help my students learn, to challenge them and inspire them to be the best that they can be in all that they do (=

In other news...

I'M LOVIN' THIS WEATHER!!!

Monday, April 16, 2007

The Adventures of Ms.Luk Begins...

Since the last post I have survived the academic giants and can proudly say that I am DONE from all my academics...for this year!

I had a week to catch up on sleep, relax, get myself organized, have some fun (And by fun, I mean FUN! Pictures have been uploaded on good ol' Facebook!) before I start my month long practicum placement tomorrow.

Everything that I have learned and practised this past year for ED leads up to the next 20 school days when I take over pretty much 50-75% of the teaching day. To be honest, I've been a bit nervous and apprehensive since I've never embarked on such a task - but I know I can do all things through Him.

So with that being said, please pray for me!

Now I must end this post as sleep is of utmost importance.

Goodnight! :)


Thanks for the vote of confidence & a healthy lunch ;)

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

I Can Almost See...

I can almost see the light...but not quite yet.

The past few days have been a complete blur as I've been sitting in front of my laptop in my pjs, sipping on Timmies or Sbux and snacking whilst trying to complete two final research papers, an assignment, block plans and a take home exam. All due in the span of four days.

Thursday is home free day...I'm almost there...I can almost taste the freedom...but until then, I remain here, in front of my laptop, in my pjs, sipping on Timmies and trying to finish my Grade 3's multiplication unit.

Random note: Oprah was really good today. Reminded me about the beauty of dreaming big dreams and living the rest of your life fulfilling that dream/your calling. So the question is, what has God placed you here on earth for?

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Hiding Place

I have found myself a hiding place
I have found myself a secret space
In the shelter of Almighty's love
In the safety of the Savior's arms

I will run to the hiding place
I will run to the hiding place
Draw me ever closer to look upon Your face
I will run to the hiding place

I have found myself a hiding place
I have found myself a secret space
In the refuge of the Father's care
In the cleansing blood of Jesus there

Through my fears may overwhelm me
And troubles may surround
Through the wind rise up to take me
My hiding place is already found
(New Life Worship)

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. Selah. - Psalm 32:7

My dove in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places on the mountainside, show me your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely. - Songs of Solomon 2:14

Then the LORD will create over all of Mount Zion and over those who assemble there a cloud of smoke by day and a glow of flaming fire by night; over all the glory will be a canopy. It will be a shelter and shade from the heat of the day, and a refuge and hiding place from the storm and rain. - Isaiah 4:5-6

My Father ministered to me all night through this song. I was introduced to it by a friend tonight. He told me that when he first listened to this song, it caused him to stop his car, pull over and listen. It had the same effect on me.

Found those verses on Biblegateway and I claim them as I study, read and write away this next week and a half.

I wanna learn more about what it means to hide in Christ...

Monday, March 26, 2007

Ran to the dom

Sometimes, 'no turning back' is hard but we gotta keep movin' on...! ;)

Turns out I won't be travelling to the West Coast next weekend..! GAH! So bittersweet!

Bitter 'cause...

- I won't get to see a childhood friend marry
- I won't get to visit my fav cousin!
- I won't get to set foot on my birthplace of beautiful British Columbian (?) soil
- I won't get a much needed 'vay-cay'

Sweet 'cause...

- The ticket is redeemable up to February 08!
- I need to finish my block plans for my one month teaching block
- I need to attend this 'important' ed meeting
- I need to finish two final papers and one take home exam
(All of the above is due the Monday I was supposed to get back from Van City)

Boo... 90% of the 'sweet' ain't so sweet huh?

But I guess I have some things to look forward too...!

1.5 weeks left of school...then one month of teaching...then our two years tucked in the middle of teaching block...then summer school...then trip to NYC tucked in the middle of summer school...then summer camp work...then second batch of summer school tucked in the middle of summer camp work...then Kelly & Vince's wedding...then back to last year of school.

Wow. There's my summer. Rigghhtt up there in that ridiculously long run-on sentence paragraph. But I suppose 'run-on' already implies long. Why is the word 'long' shorter than 'short'? Doesn't seem to make sense does it...? Oh Engrish.

EEEK! I'm losing it!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ..!
(I like to be dramatic)

School is crazy. Can't wait until these next two weeks are over!

p.s. Colliding Lights TOTALLY rocked out last night! (way-ta-go hun & band! haha)

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Bigness vs. Smallness

It's been so hard to remember that despite everything that is coming up; He's in control. As I'm sure you know from the previous post - school is stressin' and I haven't been able to make the choice of bringing it all to Him.

Whilst taking the bus home today I pulled out my ipod and picked a Willowcreek podcast sermon to listen to. This one was on prayer. I figured I needed it and wanted to learn more in light of everything and everyone around me that seems to be crying out for intervention.

Wow. The next hour or so the Spirit reminded me of what was truly missing in my life.

Him.

Getting so busy with work, doing this, doing that - I put my Best Friend on the back burner. Instead of Jesus being the Lord OF my life and being the very source of my being - He became only a part of it in these past few weeks and months. Only recently and especially today have I been propelled and drawn back to where it's safe, secure and unchanging.

As I sat there worrying about school, family and people around me at the beginning of my ride home - I got off the bus hoped filled. No matter how much I try to take issues into my own hands - there is no better place than His hands to place all that causes anxiousness.

God is BIG and I am small! I need Him and only in Him can situations and people change!

In James it says that the prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective. Does that mean we must be perfect in order for our prayers to work? Certainly not! If that was the requirement - we would be in a lot of trouble! We're righteous only because of One person.


It is only when we realize that we wear the righteousness of Christ, acknowledge the Father's immensity and rely on the Spirit that we see the fruit of powerful and effective prayers. We are important and deeply loved - yet our role is small. Crucial but small in comparison to the largeness of God.

Many times we question when God puts us in tough spots as to why He would do such a thing especially when He's a tad silent. Job was in a similar circumstance as well after he endured many trials and testings of his faith. He finally cried out to God and asked where He was and if He knew what was really going on.

I love God's response. It humbled Job and it humbled me.

Pull yourself together, Job!
Up on your feet! Stand tall!
I have some questions for you,
and I want some straight answers.
Where were you when I created the earth?
Tell me, since you know so much!
Who decided on its size? Certainly you'll know that!
Who came up with the blueprints and measurements?
How was its foundation poured,
and who set the cornerstone,
While the morning stars sang in chorus
and all the angels shouted praise?
And who took charge of the ocean
when it gushed forth like a baby from the womb?
That was me! I wrapped it in soft clouds,
and tucked it in safely at night.
Then I made a playpen for it,
a strong playpen so it couldn't run loose,
And said, 'Stay here, this is your place.
Your wild tantrums are confined to this place.'

"And have you ever ordered Morning, 'Get up!'
told Dawn, 'Get to work!'
So you could seize Earth like a blanket
and shake out the wicked like cockroaches?
As the sun brings everything to light,
brings out all the colors and shapes,
The cover of darkness is snatched from the wicked—
they're caught in the very act!

"Have you ever gotten to the true bottom of things,
explored the labyrinthine caves of deep ocean?
Do you know the first thing about death?
Do you have one clue regarding death's dark mysteries?
And do you have any idea how large this earth is?
Speak up if you have even the beginning of an answer.

"Do you know where Light comes from
and where Darkness lives
So you can take them by the hand
and lead them home when they get lost?
Why, of course you know that.
You've known them all your life,
grown up in the same neighborhood with them!

"Have you ever traveled to where snow is made,
seen the vault where hail is stockpiled,
The arsenals of hail and snow that I keep in readiness
for times of trouble and battle and war?
Can you find your way to where lightning is launched,
or to the place from which the wind blows?
Who do you suppose carves canyons
for the downpours of rain, and charts
the route of thunderstorms
That bring water to unvisited fields,
deserts no one ever lays eyes on,
Drenching the useless wastelands
so they're carpeted with wildflowers and grass?
And who do you think is the father of rain and dew,
the mother of ice and frost?
You don't for a minute imagine
these marvels of weather just happen, do you?

"Can you catch the eye of the beautiful Pleiades sisters,
or distract Orion from his hunt?
Can you get Venus to look your way,
or get the Great Bear and her cubs to come out and play?
Do you know the first thing about the sky's constellations
and how they affect things on Earth?

"Can you get the attention of the clouds,
and commission a shower of rain?
Can you take charge of the lightning bolts
and have them report to you for orders?

Job 38:2-35 (MSG)

This passage reminded me that even though I may not enjoy nor understand life sometimes - He is in control (=

Friday, March 09, 2007

Strength Will Rise

So...........

It's been a while bloggers (=

Here are a few reasons why:

1. No time
2. Busy with school
3. Nothing too witty or deep
4. Only pictures to post
5. No time

Fourth year has probably been the most academically challenging for me thus far. I have never felt so overwhelmed and so despaired in terms of school before. Even though I still make sure I have my regular doses of social stuff - I find that I am always either in a library or at Timmies. School school school - UGH.

Being in a double degree program has been a blessing but has also been the cause to many headaches, frustrations and 'GAH!'s'! It got to the point where I just wanted to give up. School felt so oppressive.

Life isn't supposed to be this way! I want my life to count for more then just readings, essays, lesson plans and exams! I don't want to fall in the trap of believing that good marks define me! I NEVER thought I would even entertain those thoughts but they slipped in through the back door.

But alas, a dear sister reminded me of something really important. Taking everything day by day. Tomorrow is only a promise. May I be faithful with today. May I be a blessing today. May I be a joy today. Strength rises as we wait upon Him.

Psalms 68:28 "Thy God hath sent forth strength for thee."

The day lies before us. It will bring us things that in ourselves we have no strength to meet. That does not matter. Our God has already sent forth strength for us. It is like that other word, "My God with His loving kindness shall come to meet me." Strength and loving kindness--what more do we need? That duty, that difficulty, which we see coming to meet us, what of it? Our God hath already sent forth strength for us, and before the thing we fear can meet us on the road, our God with His loving kindness shall meet us there. - Amy Carmichael

So, whether or not you're feeling this post - know that you're not alone. Be faithful in your school work but don't let it rule you. Be brave in front of academic giants like exams and the like and know that His strength will meet you.

Oh, and don't forget to have fun! On that note - here are some pictures of the past few weeks - without these friends to pull me away from the books or 'keep going' surprises from the bf - I would not be sane. HAH!





(Pics include: birthday surprises, dinners, parties, switchfoot concert, randoms, FUN TIMES!)

Friday, February 16, 2007

Back to Back: Twentythree

Twenty three years old.

Wow. That's young. (NOT!) haha

First off, thank you for all of your birthday wishes, calls, emails, texts, facebook messages (I got 130 in ONE day!) - I really do feel loved :) Can't wait for more partay-ing when ya'll are back for Reading Week!

God has been sooo good...my 22nd year was one full of valley lows and mountain highs. From the enriching and challenging year of serving at school and all that jazz to the most exhilarating adventure travelling to Asia with Mike for four months. It's been one heck of a ride and I'm ready for this year!

The morn of my birthday I felt the Lord tell me that my word of the year would simply be: faith. I gotta get rid of the old way of thinking, how to do things and begin to trust His unconventional, irregular, totally non-religious ways of doing stuff. Faith - it's a good word and I'm pumped!

So - back to back :) My birthday lands on the 13th and of course the infamous commericalized Hallmark day follows on the 14th. Although we openly make fun of Valentine's Day being over-rated...I know deep down, we all kinda love it :) hehe

And for all those who've asked about how my day(s) were; here's my answer...

...it was more than I could ever hope for :)

The older you get - the more you begin to appreciate the small things in life. You appreciate those who are close and dear to you. As you 'grow up' - your circle of friends become more defined, more intimate and perhaps a tad smaller. It's natural as people step into new chapters in their life, get married (gosh - some people are already 'there'!), accept jobs that take you 'round the world etc. It's times like these that I grow reflective and sentimental...I absolutely love where the Lord's put me right now but I know full well it may all just change a year from now as I blow out 24 candles *gasp*

But for now...I'm going to embrace and enjoy where I am and keep trusting that my tomorrow's are in His hands :)

So here's the DL on my bday! I had a yummy lunch with my parentals as they reminisced about how I came into the world - quite bloody actually haha and how much they've seen me grown. It was nice sitting down, laughing, poking fun, reflecting on how good God's been... :)

Then around 5 Mike swings by to pick me up for a night of surprise! He blindfolds me with what he claims to be 'clean' and what I'm pretty sure is a dirty rag (hahahahaha) and drives off. I've always been nervous about surprises 'cause you never know what may fly into your face (perhaps a lemon meringue pie? that's a WHOLE 'nother story! haha).



As he's driving I can kinda figure out where we are but once we get off the highway I'm lost. We park after what seems like an eternity and he leads me out. Remember, I'm blindfolded this whole time! I felt so disabled I could only trust that he wouldn't lead me into a wall or forget to tell me to 'step up' when we reached a ledge/stairway ('cause I forgot on his birthday haha).

We go up this elevator, he opens the door and it's all dark. I seriously thought something might jump at me so I'm holding on for dear life. Telling me to keep my eyes closed, he takes off my blindfold, switches on the light and hugs me from behind. Then I open my eyes and the first thing I see is a beautifully printed menu.

I turn around and find that we're in this amazing condo (of our dreams haha) and he says, "I will be your chef, waiter and date for the night...Happy Birthday baby" :)

AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

A three course gourmet meal, cooked by the bf, privacy in a really chic condo (since we both live in busy/loud homes!) and a nice view of the Toronto streets.

Oh and just in case you're wondering, 'cause I did...Mike did not buy me the condo for my present haha It was on loan for the evening by a good friend of ours (thanks D.Yoo!)

It was the perfect night! He got off work early to prep and marinate all the food - he even did a practise run down of the whole menu on Saturday while I was away! It was sooooo nice to spend my birthday with my favorite, watching him cook everything from scratch (haha - I'm SO not the domestic one!), eating ohmygoshsodelicious food (I was SO impressed!) and then playing Scrabble (we absolutely LOVE this game haha)! After leaving our friend's place, we crashed at my place, ate dessert and then I was serenaded :) Before I make you all sick to the stomach with LOVE! Here are some pictures and menu from the night :)

Appetizer

Pan Seared Goat Cheese with Fresh Figs and Arugula
Breaded goat cheese, pan fried and warmed served over an arugula salad and fresh figs


Entrees

Slow Cooked Atlantic Salmon with Cardamon
Yogurt-bathed Atlantic salmon seasoned with Cardamon, pan seared then oven baked to perfection



Certified Seared Canadian Angus Beef with Potato Hash Brown
Certified Canadian black Angus beef pan seared to liking. Served with homemade potato hash browns

Dessert

Chilled Kahlua Zabaglione
Italian mouse-like custard topped with meringue and premium dark chocolate shavings. Served with biscotti


Dinner served with Catena Malbec 2005 from Argentina

Chef: Michael Lau

I couldn't have asked for a better birthday... :) If any of you know Mike, you'll know how completely selfless he is and how he always puts others before himself. He always goes out of his way to make me feel loved, special and appreciated practically every day. He says it's because I'm 'worth it' or that I 'deserve even more'. So on Vday when most bf's are scrambling to pull off these huge plans - I wanted to do something crazy and totally unexpected for him!

I cleaned up the guest room in our basement and transformed it into an indoor picnic with stars stuck on the ceiling so we could 'star gaze' inside since it was too cold outside! I hung homemade heart mobiles on the ceiling and laid out a pink table cloth to be our picnic blanket. I baked a ton of goodies and chocolate coated everything from shortbread to strawberries. The whole room was lit up by white lights and candles. I complied all of our favorite songs onto a new playlist on iTunes and everything was set. I gotta say...it looked pretty darn good! I was pretty taken back by it too! haha

So on Vday he surprised me with a beautiful bouquet of roses and took me out to one of our fave places to eat. It was just soooooo good to have 'us' time especially since I'm on Reading Week. After dinner we went back to my place for what he thought was a night of chilling and watching a flick etc. but little did he know he was in for a mega surprise!

When he walked into the room he was completely floored....it was SO great to see him being on the receiving end of crazy amazing plans! He was pretty speechless! All the baking and slaving away at the stove TOTALLY paid off to see him so happy :)

So...YAY for two amazing days and another 'just because' surprise today ;)